Thursday, May 26, 2011
I'm a stay at home mom and although, I am usually really happy about this and I absolutely love being able to stay at home to raise my son, there are some days that I feel guilty. Is this normal? I feel like everybody just thinks I'm lazy and don't want to work. The truth is, I only get four years to spend with my son. I don't want to put him in daycare while I'm fortunate enough to have the option to stay at home with him.
Am I selfish for doing this? I know my husband doesn't LOVE to work and would give anything to be at home with my son everyday. And ofcourse, our household could use some extra money. I don't think anybody would be opposed to the extra income. Everytime I think about this, I feel sooo guilty. I feel like I'm not contributing to my household or my marriage. Why do I feel like this? My husband has never said or done anything to make me feel like this. He's never asked me to work and put AJ in daycare.
I know my job is an important one. I know my son is lucky to be able to stay at home and be raised by his mommy. I'm not the kind of person to feel anxious to get out of the house for at least a few hours a day. I'm perfectly content being a stay at home mom. In fact, I'm more than content. I feel complete. I have a purpose. But do I? Or am I just being selfish? I'm not exactly the best at keeping my house clean and making well-balanced meals.
It's just one of those days. I need some thoughts and I need to know that I'm not alone. Am I alone in this? Does the fact that I feel guilty about this actually make me guilty? I know that today's society expects moms to return to the workforce and find childcare for their children. Is there no place for traditional values anymore? I don't want to offend anybody with this post and I hope I didn't. I wish I were brave enough to let my little angel go. The truth is, I even cry when I think about him starting school and not being able to spend all my time with him.
All I want to know is, as a stay at home mom, do you ever feel like this?
I think I might delete this post.